Interview: Lee Kyle

Photo by Sammy Dobson

South Shields comedian Lee Kyle will be taking his new Bottle It on tour throughout the North of England and into Scotland in early 2025, stopping off at Carnival House, Sunderland (21st February). The Forum, Darlington (13th March). Coliseum Centre, Whitby (14th March), Arts Centre, Washington (28th March), Platform One, Bedlington (11th April) and Tyne Theatre, Newcastle (18th April) en route (Tickets can be booked here).

The show discusses Lee’s activity of throwing messages in bottles into the sea asking people to reply and deals with the harm done by a big family secret as well as his struggles with his own mind.

We catch up with Lee to find out more…

How long have you been doing comedy for and when did you start?
I’ve been a comedian for just over fifteen years now, starting in November 2009. It’s been my full-time living since the end of 2013.

Who are your biggest comedic influences and why?
They’ve changed I suppose, I’d struggle to give you one now as I try and not be influenced as I think that being myself as much as possible while trying to tell the truth has been most fruitful for me. But, in the past, I’ve always loved double acts, from Cannon and Ball as a kid, through Lee and Herring and, when I started comedy, Peacock and Gamble.

As to why, I think I might just like watching people argue!

What do you think sets your comedy apart from others in the industry?
Oh, that’s always a huge problem, I always thought of myself as having no USP but now I think that I am unusual in that I’m a quite feminine heterosexual man who grew up on a council estate but has different opinions than what people from my background are often presented as having. The media tends to love presenting the working class as one homogenous group.

What’s the biggest lesson you’ve learned from your experiences in the comedy world?
That comedians are mostly nice people. That there is a world out there for people who don’t belong anywhere else and that I’m glad I found it.

What’s your process for refining and testing new jokes?
I’m lucky in that I get to compere a lot of gigs which means I can slip new bits in fairly easily and am able to think quickly (Usually!) and add gags onstage. A lot of comedians don’t feel comfortable doing this but I find that there’s no more exciting way of trying things. I trust myself to be funny when I need to.

How do you go about writing material for a new show?
I try to vary it. So I’ll sit and write and edit but I also record myself just talking as though I’m onstage. It is mortifyingly embarrassing at first but you get over it.

The main thing I do is simply that I’m a bit of an obsessive, so I tend to be thinking about it when I should actually be doing other things. 

Where did the idea behind Bottle It come from?
I did a podcast (Which Is The Best?) with Sammy Dobson for a few years. We recorded one episode near the beach in South Shields and sent a message in a bottle out on a whim. A few weeks later we got a reply from Sweden!

I’ve always been interested in very remote places, particularly islands, so this appealed to me. The idea marinated but from that moment it was always going to happen.

What have been some of your most memorable responses from those who have found your messages?
I can’t say too much, but one followed me home.

How did these bottle messages influence the content of the show?
Hugely, they all stem from them. They introduced ideas about male and female friendships and secrets, both of which are big themes. They also made me question why I’m trying to communicate with strangers rather than people who I need to communicate with.

Your show deals with the harm done by a big family secret. Can you elaborate further without giving anything away?
Not too much. Erm.. the secret probably won’t ever be properly discussed now as, as far as I know, the people with answers are not alive anymore. I can look back and say that it has led to me having problems with a thing called Maladaptive Daydreaming which is funny (luckily) to talk about but is a coping mechanism that means I don’t ever deal with my problems.

What insights do you hope to share about male mental health through your show?
People say that we don’t ever talk about men’s mental health. I’d argue that we do, but I’m not sure that we talk about it with the right people. I talk about it jokingly but I also honestly believe that most heterosexual men don’t even consider the idea of forming genuine friendships with women.

When we talk about old men being lonely because men tend to die younger, I’ve always been confused that they don’t just hang out with old women. I believe that the idea that men and women are almost separate creatures is hugely harmful and means that men do not learn how to empathise usefully and so are unable to help other men with their struggles and so the cycle continues.

How do you balance the raw honesty of your struggles with your mind while maintaining the comedic aspect of your performance?
The joke is the man thing. I’d never put something in just for reasons of honesty or making a point. But I don’t think the two things are exclusive.

I think that honesty and rawness makes shows funnier rather than less so, because people get to know you and your viewpoint so the gags and routines can hit harder.

Growing up in a council estate with diverse experiences, how do you use your background to challenge stereotypes in your comedy?
I hate the idea that working-class people are naturally right-wing or that we are unable to take concepts on board. I’m a 45-year-old man, and you know what? Pronouns are simply not difficult to grasp. I also hate the idea that, because of my job, I live in an echo chamber. I live in South Shields, a very poor town that had the UK’s first-ever race riots. I played Sunday League football. I didn’t know any out gay people until my twenties. I think it is important that people like me talk to people like me about how I view things. I also think it’s important that people like me talk to people who aren’t like me.

But I also think that left-wing comedy has to be harsh if it is going to be done. I don’t always talk politically but, when I do, I hate the idea that the left always has to be conciliatory. 

How do you think your show Bottle It will resonate with audiences dealing with similar personal struggles?
There is a bit, where I talk about Maladaptive Daydreaming, where a lot of the crowd look at me like I’m weird but there are always a few who realise that they do something similar. I love hearing those stories afterwards. There is a woman in Scotland who told me she’s been imagining she’s been married to Marti Pellow for thirty years!

What do you hope audiences take away from this show?
That you are okay being weird. 

You are out on tour from February to April. How do you prepare mentally and physically for a tour?
Physically, I don’t. I’m a mess! Mentally? Same.

What’s the most rewarding part of performing live for you?
It doesn’t always happen, but, if there’s a moment where you can get the crowd perfectly quiet waiting for a punchline which then hits huge at a key part of the show, there’s a magic in that moment.

What’s the most memorable moment you’ve had on stage?
I once did a kids’ show where I put lemon juice in my eye because I got caught in the moment and reasoned with myself that it wouldn’t hurt.  It really hurts.

Then, because I’m very easily led, I put pepper in because they told me to. I’m here to tell you that pepper hurts even more and that you should not put pepper in your eye. I suspect you already knew that.

Are there any rituals or routines you follow before going on stage?
Nah, I try to just go on as relaxed as I can, so I just chat to other acts. My ideal gig is one where I’m not even thinking about it on the day until my name is announced. I really care, but, for me, I’m at my best when I can trick myself into thinking I don’t.

What else does 2025 have in store for you?
I hope to relax more after April! One thing I’m looking forward to is a series of shows at The Stand from June where I’ll be working on shows with promising newer acts where they make their first-ever solo shows with me as the director.

That’s really motivating me right now, working with others. I love directing stand-up shows, it’s very rewarding when acts I enjoy start to see a show form in front of their eyes.